SEVEN RAVENS
  • Educational Services
  • Seven Ravens Coaching
  • blog

let's begin again

every life tells a story

answers, and more questions

10/4/2015

1 Comment

 
red maple anemia
See the red of this tree? It's the color of the blood cells my body lacks. What happens when you learn your character flaws may actually be symptoms of physical illness?
sometimes, I wonder if it's just me.  I assume it is; maybe that's my only child individualism talking -- I assume everyone else is doing just fine, and I need to suck it up and get on with working, cleaning, writing, caring ...

Like the way I assumed that my sudden panics, the way my chest would constrict and I would dissolve into desperate, sobbing tears throughout my adolescence and early adulthood, was just me being overly dramatic and self-absorbed.  And then I found out I had a heart murmur that was causing my sympathetic nervous system to flip out and go into panic mode.  I'm okay; it's a pretty low-grade valve issue, one that runs in the family, one that doesn't threaten my life, just my feeling of being able to cope.  

Or else, I assume that everyone feels like I do, and I need to stop making the choices that lead to pain -- it's a sign of immaturity and weakness! Like the way I just assume that I'm over-indulging, that people just can't eat salad and something greasy and alcohol at the same meal -- that no one can, and that I'm to blame for the gripping pain and nausea and illness.  

Like the way I assume everyone has stomach pain after eating, or some other pain, and I'm just whining.  Everyone is tired and emotional. They just deal with it better than I do.

But I'm actually ill. I'm severely anemic. My body is harboring bacteria that are making my stomach hurt, and perhaps even bleed internally. I may have had these little invaders living and thriving in my belly for years.  They have been linked to ulcers, gastritis, tension headaches, anemia, anxiety, depression. And if we can get rid of them, and support my system's return to health, maybe the symptoms will go away.

Having answers, like h. pylori and a hemoglobin level of 8.0 and dropping, helps a little.  It also raises more questions -- is this to blame for everything?  How long has this been going on?  Who else is suffering with this? How much slack should I be cutting myself, and how much do I need to just get on with it? 

The other question that came to me last night was, "What story do I need to hear to find my way out of this?  Where am I right now in the story? What do I need?" When I found these questions in the parking lot of the grocery store, as I loaded my low-fiber foods into the car and shivered a little in the crisp October air, the light seemed to shift a little.  Not a lot-- I haven't found the right story yet, and these questions don't have answers yet -- but a little.  These are the questions that can lead to healing, when we identify our story, and can begin to find our way through.
​
1 Comment
jill rae
10/4/2015 10:48:41 pm

You need to take diatomaceous earth this will solve the majority of your health issues. Get it from Earth Works. It is cheep safe and quick. I know over a dozen people who have these same symptoms and have found great results. Just don't tell a doctor this or you will be kicked out

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Picture
    hi. that's me.

    Author

     Hi. That's me. I write, sometimes, about  parenting, storytelling, and about living a life with stories.

    Buy Me a Coffee!!!


    RSS Feed

    Categories

    All
    Biography
    Coaching
    Fairytales
    Festivals
    Life
    Links!
    Musings
    Parenting
    Story/reading
    Storytelling
    Teaching
    Waldorf
    Writing

    Archives

    April 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    January 2022
    June 2021
    January 2021
    July 2020
    June 2020
    April 2020
    February 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    March 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    May 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    May 2013
    April 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013

    RSS Feed

Proudly powered by Weebly
Photos used under Creative Commons from elvissa, gagilas, jkavo, Ross Elliott, libertygrace0, The Daring Librarian, Bob the courier
  • Educational Services
  • Seven Ravens Coaching
  • blog